1 week and 2 days later

I am HORRIBLE at updating this thing! I had a doctors appointment wednesday and things went great!! I was given a timeline on how things will probably be going, I can walk a lot better now, and pain is pretty much minimal. I was pretty much a happy girl until last night.

Last night was the final night of revival, and it was ending with a teen activity at the end of things. It was the Kidnapping Kaper which was a scavenger hunt of sorts. I decided to go, to just hang out, knowing full well I couldn't participate. I was ok at the beginning feeling only a hint of loneliness, but by the end of the evening my heart was breaking. Mainly because I know that this will be my life for the next 6 months. Always being passed by. I came home and had a break down of sorts. Knowing that the next 6 months are not only going to be very hard physically, they are going to be extremely hard emotionally. While my friends go off and can run, and play and goof off, I will always be the one having to take it slow, and easy. I struggled with feelings of loneliness, abandonment, emptiness, and fear. I also felt like a burden and a hardship to those around me. I couldn't help but thinking how aggravating I must be to everyone. The odd man out who needs all the help, and that feeling bothered me, especially since I am so independent. I ended up crying for quite a while, and I'm still struggling with those feelings, and I know I will be for a while.

But luckily, today was REALLY good for me. I got out, went and saw a movie, went to dinner, and went shopping, and felt somewhat normal again. It was great. so what me knee is swollen now, I had a great day. :P Now off to bed!